Wednesday, September 30, 2009

A young naval student

A young naval student was being put through the paces by an old sea captain.

"What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?"

"Throw out an anchor, sir," the student replied.

"What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?"

"Throw out another anchor, sir."

"And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do then?" asked the captain.

"Throw out another anchor, sir."

"Hold on," said the captain. "Where are you getting all those anchors from?"

"From the same place you're getting your storms, sir."

People You Meet - Quotes


Many people will walk in and out of your life,
but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use your head;
To handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
Great minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss events;
Small minds discuss people.
God gives every bird its food,
But He does not throw it into its nest.
He who loses money, loses much;
He who loses a friend, loses more;
He who loses faith, loses all.

Beautiful young people are acts of nature,
But beautiful old people are works of art.
Learn from the mistakes of others.
You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
The tongue weighs practically nothing,
But so few people can hold it.
Friends, you and me....
you brought another friend...
and then there were 3...
we started our group...
Our circle of friends...
and like that circle...
there is no beginning or end..

[Author unknown]

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Daddy is going to war

The following is supposedly a true story relating a situation that actually occurred during the war.

During the Persian Gulf War, I was assigned to go to Saudi Arabia. As I was saying good-bye to my family, my three-year-old son, Christopher, was holding on to my leg and pleading with me not to leave. "No, Daddy, please don't go!" he kept repeating.

We were beginning to make a scene when my wife, desperate to calm him, said, "Let Daddy go and I'll take you to get a pizza."

Immediately, Christopher loosened his death grip, stepped back and in a calm voice said, "'Bye, Daddy."

Monday, September 28, 2009

Expiration Dates

Find out when common food, drinks, & household items expire.

Item
Refrigerated
Frozen
Eggs
4 to 5 weeks
-
Fish
1 to 2 days
4 to 6 months
Ground Meat
1 to 2 days
3 to 4 months
Poultry
1 to 2 days
12 months
Steak
3 to 5 days
6 to 8 months
Canned Tuna
1 year
Canned Tuna (opened)
3 to 4 days

Item
Refrigerated
Cheddar
3 to 6 months
Cottage Cheese
2 weeks
Grated Parmesan
12 months
Swiss Cheese
3 to 6 months
Processed American
8 months
Chocolate Bar
1 year
Marshmallows (opened)
40 weeks
Marshmallows (unopened)
3 months

Item
Shelf Life
Crackers
3 to 6 months
Plain Bread
2 weeks
Oatmeal
12 months
Instant Cereal
2 to 3 months
Pasta
24 months
White Rice
24 months
Brown Rice
6 months

Item
Shelf Life
Bananas
3 to 6 days
Apples
6 months
Onions
2 weeks
Potatoes
4 weeks
Maraschino Cherries
3 to 4 years
Green Olives (jarred & unopened)
3 years
Green Olives (jarred & opened)
3 months
Pickles (unopened)
18 months
Pickles (opened)
n/a (do not eat if slippery or soft)

Item
Refrigerated
Yellow Mustard
6 to 8 months
Ketchup
24 months
Mayonnaise
3 to 4 months
Jams & Jellies
18 months
Salad Dressings
3 months
Brown Sugar
4 months
Honey
never expires
Maple Syrup
1 year
Olive Oil
2 years from manufacture date
Steak Sauce
33 months (color affected but still safe to eat)
Tabasco Sauce
5 years
Soy Sauce (Bottled)
2 years
Soy Sauce (opened)
3 months (taste changes but still safe to eat)
Vinegar
42 months
Worcestershire Sauce
2 years (5 to 10 years if unopened)

Item
Ground Coffee (unopened)
2 years
Ground Coffee (opened)
1 month, refrigerated
Gourmet Coffee beans
3 weeks
Gourmet Coffee ground
1 week if sealed
Instant Coffee (unopened)
2 years
Instant Coffee (opened)
1 month
Unopened Soda (plastic bottle)
3 months (from 'best by' date)
Opened Soda (plastic bottle)
doesn't spoil (but taste is affected)
Unopened Juice Bottle
8 months from production date
Opened Juice Bottle
7 to 10 days
Wine (unopened)
3 years from vintage date
Wine (opened)
1 week refrigerated and corked
Fine Wine
20 to 100 years

Item
Bar Soap
18 to 36 months
Bath Gel (Body Wash)
3 years
Bath Oil
1 year
Body Bleaches (unopened)
2 years
Body Bleaches (used)
6 months
Body Lotion
3 years
Eye Cream (unopened)
3 years
Eye Cream (opened)
1 year
Face Lotion
3 years
Face Lotion with SPF
check the expiration date

Item
Aerosol Air Freshener
2 years
Antifreeze (premixed)
1 to 5 years
Antifreeze (concentrate)
never expires
Alkaline Batteries
7 years
Lithium Batteries
10 years
Bleach
3 to 6 months
Dish Detergent (liquid or powder)
1 year
Fire Extinguisher
12 years
Fire Extinguisher (rechargeable)
service/replace every 6 years
Metal Polish
3 years
Miracle Gro
3 to 8 years
Miracle Gro (water-soluble)
never expires
Motor Oil
2 to 5 years
Motor Oil (opened)
3 months
Mr. Clean
2 years
Paint (unopened)
about 10 years
Paint (opened)
2 to 5 years
Spray Paint
2 to 3 years
Windex
2 years
Wood Polish
2 years
Foundation (water-based)
3 years
Foundation (oil-based)
2 years
Hair Gel
2 to 3 years
Hair Spray
2 to 3 years
Lip Balm (unopened)
5 years
Lip Balm (opened)
1 to 5 years
Lipstick
2 years
Mascara (unopened)
2 years
Mascara (opened)
3 to 4 months
Mouthwash
3 years from manufacture date
Nail Polish
1 year
Nail Polish Remover
never expires
Perfume
1 to 2 years
Rubbing Alcohol
about 3 years
Shampoo
2 to 3 years
Shaving Cream
2 years
Tooth Whitening Strips
13 months
Moist Wipes (unopened)
2 years
Moist Wipes (opened)
until completely dry

Item
Frozen Dinners
12 to 18 months
Ground Coffee (opened)
1 month, refrigerated
Gourmet Coffee beans
3 weeks
Gourmet Coffee ground
1 week if sealed
Instant Coffee (unopened)
2 years
Instant Coffee (opened)
1 month
Frozen Vegetables (unopened)
18 to 24 months
Frozen Vegetables (opened)
1 month
Peanuts (unopened)
1 to 2 years
Peanuts (opened)
1 to 2 weeks
Peanut Butter (natural)
2 years
Peanut Butter (processed)
6 months (refrigerate after 3 mo.)
Protein Bars
10 to 12 months
Tea Bags
2 years